Somebody ripped the gun out of a Time Crisis machine. Why don’t you just slap the smile off the Mona Lisa?
dick
Just like a diplomat, this diplomat coffee/tea tries to be everything to everyone.
In the midwest, this is a medium.
It’s so easy to say fuck you to your body out here.
[video]
mtv:
watch here.
I’ve been gif’d!
“Waterfall Restaurant in the Village of Escudero, Philippines. Patrons eat right next to the breathtaking waterfall and have water flowing around their feet!”
via NotCot.
Wow.
[video]
RULES FOR MAKING AN 80’S MOVIE
1. Must have a fat guy.
2. Fat guy must be eating in every scene OR he must end a scene where he is not eating by saying something about food (i.e. “Are you going to eat that?”, “Let’s get something to eat!”, “I eat my feelings.”)
3. Must have a plethora of racially insensitive stereotypes. Note, only ever use the ‘Happy Black Guy’ stereotype. NEVER the ‘Angry Militant Black’ stereotype. Unless the ‘Angry Militant Black stereotype is used to scare the ‘Rich White Asshole’ stereotype, then it’s ok because it’s not racist. (For further reading, please see Revenge of the Nerds).
4. Must have a food fight scene (note, you can substitute frogs)
5. Must have a scene where a cake flies through the air (slow motion shot obviously) and have it land on an authority figure (preferable the ‘Angry White Mustachioed Dean’ stereotype). While this can be done in your food fight scene, I would recommend having it at a fancy catered event (i.e., wedding, prom, alumni reception.) Note, if you go with prom, you can substitute a punch bowl for the cake but the punch must be red.
6. Must have huge dorm room or house that no actual college student could ever live in.
7. Boobs. Make it rain that shit all over the screen.
8. You know the ‘Nerdy Friend Who Isn’t Hot at First But Then Totally Is Later’ stereotype? The house she lives in MUST have stairs. Always. You need it for the slow motion walk she’ll have down the stairs (after she’s let her hair down), so our hero can be all like, ”Whaaa… Darlene, is that you?” This shot will also be in the trailer.
9. Close up shots of girls’ crotches in spandex. This can be at the beach while our guys watch girls in unitards roller skate (because that was a thing) OR if the movie is not set in California (which is rare), it can be shot through the windows of an aerobics studio. Note, it’s a guaranteed laugh line if you end the scene with the ‘White Fat Guy’ stereotype saying something like, “I wouldn’t mind eating that!”
10. The ‘Nerd White Hero Virgin’ stereotype has to punch the ‘Rich White Asshole’ stereotype or something like that. It doesn’t really matter. As long as there’s a choreographed dance or song at some point. Note, make sure to have the ‘White Fat Guy’ stereotype NOT dancing, but instead eating all the food at the now vacant buffet table.
Having a Babcocky kind of a night.*
* Babcock cooking apron not pictured.